Distractions

I know that many people use blogs as a sot of Ego- boosting diary, I am using this to simply write out what I feel. I think I may be truly terrified of going to college, I don't really want to go to a Christian university but my parents are pushing the idea. I believe in God and the Bible but....The overly pretentious "Christian" people that populate those places make me want to puke. I don't want mandatory chapel or uniforms either. I want the opportunity to find a group of friends I fit in with, my best friend lives in Alaska now, so it seems to be time to start looking for some companionship. I've always kept my feelings locked up....I want someone to say "I know how you feel" and truly mean it. Here's something, I have never had a relationship with a girl because of my self-esteem and the fact that I don't want just another pretty face. I have NEVER found anyone who has the same interests as me, I'm hoping college will change that...I guess I'll just have to toss a coin and hope.